Two years writing a blog

Well it has been two years since I started this blog. Things have certainly changed since then. I’ve published three novels, and one poetry book. I’ve written yet another book, and I’m working on getting it edited now. Also I’m in the process of writing yet another book as well. Also I’ve a job I’m happy enough going in to most days. Something I’d never expected to happen.

I feel proud of these accomplishments, and yet I don’t think I’ll ever want to be satisfied. I hope to have no day come where I say, “Well, that’s it. I did everything I wanted to.” I’m not saying I don’t want to feel happy about what I’m doing, all I’m saying is that I never want a time to come where I’ve no goals left.

Luckily writing always gives me a goal. Either it being writing a new story I’ve thought of, or just simply trying to get better at this craft. Also it gives me another goal. A goal that I’m not too fond of. That being trying to advertise myself and my books.

I think to myself, how can I let people know about my books? These books that I’m proud of, and I like, without sounding like I’m full of myself, or worse, sounding annoying? I don’t go out of my way in my day-to-day life to let anyone know I’ve done this, but it does come up. Usually I only talk about it for a few minutes, unless someone seems interested. Then I might go on a little more. I hope I’ve interpreted their interest correctly because I always worry about sounding like I’m trying to push it on people.

Yes I feel very accomplished by what I’ve done, but I think most people could do similar if they just gave themselves the time to do it. Heck, I’d like it everyone at least wrote one book in their life. We all generally have some tale that has been building up in us. May it be just a retelling of our lives, or maybe a concept that can’t be easily put across without a story, I think the world would be better if there were a book by each person so we might come to a better understanding of each other.

And for this reason I’m unsure how to go about alerting more people that there is a Science Fiction series here to read. I would like to think it is interesting, and a little different from any other. There are elements you can find in it that reflect other novels I’ve read, but there is a pace to it that is unlike anything else I’ve read. The comments I’ve gotten suggest it is hard to put down, and in some way is almost a relaxing thing to read.

While there are elements to overcome, the protagonist is able to do so without worry or panic. It all flows together, and this is kinda how I see challenges, though I’m sure I panic a little more. Not a Mary Sue, but a way a person might, if they were able, to win the day without panic. Using logic and compassion is the way I say. Be mindful, and care for others. That might even be the real point of the story.

What I’ve published

Outsider Trilogy

Outsiders-Book-Cover-RGB-web-safeClick here for a link to the book

Poetry

poems_front2

Link to my author page on Amazon – hhttp://www.amazon.com/Steven-Oaks/e/B00MEGSEZ6

Link to the Deathship book in the CreateSpace store – https://www.createspace.com/5023771

Or you can help me out on Patreon. Again, thank you. https://www.patreon.com/StevenOaks

Update: 1,000 words of a new book written. Several pages edited for the yet unnamed novel.

“Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow where they lead.”
― Louisa May Alcott

Steven Oaks

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Journal Entry

Day #12,982

My daily struggle to fit in with these humans is becoming interesting. When talking of relationships all I hear is that people are surprised at how I’ve been able to for the most part maintain a friendly relationship with anyone I’ve been lucky enough to spend prolong periods of time with. It is apparently so anomalous that it has become standard fare for comedic situations to put a husband and wife at odds instead of them trying to work together.

People find it strange if I were to say something absurd to a partner that partner wouldn’t just immediately smack me. I’m not saying this has never happened, but I think it would be strange with a person I’d like to spend time with. Though I certainly can be annoying, at times I try to be, it is more for comedic effect and not to illicit a physical attack.

What I’m getting at is that several people I talk with seem to think there is an active war between the genders. A male may say something and apparently a female is supposed to become offended at a request for favor. The reverse seems to be true as a male isn’t suppose to be docile towards a woman and agree to any demands. What the heck? If you are in a relationship you are in a partnership. This means you must talk about all needs, wants, and desires. To hide them from each other would be a silly notion and could only lead to such bad blood that I see in these so-called couples in television. In fact the only healthy relationship that pops into my mind from TV is from the Adams Family.

Morticia and Gomez adore each other, and jump to act to please one another. They love their children, and encourage them constantly to go out and do what makes them happy. It just so happens they are all morbid individuals, but that doesn’t take away from the love they show each other.

There is a certain amount of compromises that need to be given when in a relationship. No one is so perfectly matched that there isn’t something that would cause a partner to be upset if continued. You just have to evaluate if the other person is worth the sacrifices you might have to make to be with them.

I’m not talking physical beauty when I talk about wanting to be with another. That can fade. I’m talking of the joy you get from being with them. If being with them isn’t a positive thing, for the most part as we all have times when things are bad, then you might need to end it. Don’t waste their time, and don’t waste yours on a relationship that isn’t going to last a lifetime. I’ve never been about trying to find a person for the moment, so take that as you will. I’ve only ever desired to be with people who I think I could spend my entire life with, and do that happily.

What I’ve learned from young love is that it is completely irrational, and mostly based on whoever is nearby, and of course who you find physically attractive. Nothing wrong with that usually, but don’t think that is a basis for a long-lasting relationship. You have to share a common enjoyment in things. Be it hobbies or activities, and you have to enjoy doing these things with them. Personally I love to talk about strange and unusual things like politics, sex, religion, and philosophy. You get involved in a conversation like that with me I’ll be immediately charmed. Hence my enjoyment of foreign media, or dark comedies. They look at the world differently than I’ve seen.

Examples of such things would be Rick and Morty, Venture Brothers, and many anime targeted at more adult audiences. I’m not talking about porn here, I’m talking about shows that aren’t animated for children. And realizing I said animated and my list only contains animated shows I suppose I’ll have to list a few others. Sherlock, Doctor Who, and Supernatural. They can be dark, they can be funny, but what they aren’t is taking the easy way out of a story. Well, besides the last season of Doctor Who… there were a couple of good episodes, but mostly it felt flat to me.

In the end I’m just surprised to see all these people apparently unhappy with who they are with. Are we just so scared to be alone that we latch on to whoever is nearby? Alone isn’t a bad thing, though it can be difficult at times. But it most certainly helps you get to know yourself. You really should try to do that before committing to another.

I can’t suggest a length of time for such self-reflection, but a year should do it. Maybe a month or so is all you need, but we all need to explore what it is that makes us up before we try to understand another.

Love is a complicated thing, one that I’m unsure that can ever be expressed through words. The closest definition for me came from an author that has influenced my life greatly. He says “Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” – Heinlein. And I’m going to have to agree with it, though it seems to missing the flavor of the emotion.

Don’t stay with those who can’t, or who refuse to try to make you happy.

 

What I’ve published

Outsider Trilogy

Outsiders-Book-Cover-RGB-web-safeClick here for a link to the book

Poetry

poems_front2

Link to my author page on Amazon – hhttp://www.amazon.com/Steven-Oaks/e/B00MEGSEZ6

Link to the Deathship book in the CreateSpace store – https://www.createspace.com/5023771

Or you can help me out on Patreon. Again, thank you. https://www.patreon.com/StevenOaks

Update: 1,000 words of a new book written. Several pages edited for the yet unnamed novel.

“It’s almost if you actively look for love you won’t find it. You just have to recognize it when it finds you.” – Steven Oaks

Steven Oaks

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Random Anxiety

I feel like I’m finally getting the swing of my new position. Things are going smoothly, and for that I’m thankful. I was feeling just a little overwhelmed a few days, and not having a car I wasn’t able to stay over to finish some of the things that came in later. Luckily I’m able to cope with the load now.

However, there was one day this week when I seemed to have lost control over my own emotions. I think I’ll call it an anxiety attack. Everything was making me feel anxious, even breathing. It happened on the way to work, and when I got there it only got worse. Now I recall feeling something similar last year when I was drinking too much coffee, so perhaps it was just that again. But I didn’t drink any more than usual, so I’m unsure. I settled down around noon, but for four hours I was in extreme panic.

Speaking of anxiety, I did my taxes earlier today. Searching out random paper work after you’ve moved months ago didn’t help, but I filed. It took an hour to do all of it, but it went smoothly enough. Had I not moved I would have had a bigger return, but meh, it was costing too much to live there. On the plus side I learned that I more than tripled the income I’m getting from my books last year. If I can do that again I think I’ll be doing very well. Well being that I’m making progress.

I’ve a couple of books lined up for this year, so maybe that’ll help. I’m still writing one, but the other is going through edits. You might already know that if you follow me here. Things are progressing, and my latest book is flowing much better these days. I had an issue a couple of weeks ago where I didn’t know what I wanted to do with the story, but now it’s all flowing.

I hope you all continue to have wonderful weeks, and I’ll talk to you soon.

 

 

What I’ve published

Outsider Trilogy

Outsiders-Book-Cover-RGB-web-safeClick here for a link to the book

Poetry

poems_front2

Link to my author page on Amazon – hhttp://www.amazon.com/Steven-Oaks/e/B00MEGSEZ6

Link to the Deathship book in the CreateSpace store – https://www.createspace.com/5023771

Or you can help me out on Patreon. Again, thank you. https://www.patreon.com/StevenOaks

Update: 1,000 words of a new book written. Several pages edited for the yet unnamed novel.

“If you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath.”
― Amit Ray

Steven Oaks

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And another week passes

The new week brought similar challenges to the last. This time I felt more comfortable, and things went much smoother… for the most part.

Edits now are being done Saturday night, and or Sunday morning for one of my books. It’s going well, and we should have it all wrapped up within the next few months. I’m not sure of an exact time as some days we go through so much, but other days we can only get a few pages done. However it is progressing.

Work is still interesting, and I’m feeling more confident in the position. Nothing else to be said about this, save I’m getting along with all I work with… which seems to be normal for me these days.

I still haven’t found a vehicle in my price range that appears reliable enough that I’m willing to part with the hard-earned money I’m saving up for this venture. But at least I haven’t wasted it on junk. Perhaps in the next few months I’ll have enough to afford something better than now, I just hope my ride continues to be so reliable.

I’m getting an idea for something else to do on here, but I’m unsure if I’ll have the time to do it. I don’t want to have it eat into the time I spend editing and creating these posts. Nor am I sure I’ll have the time during the week. We’ll see if I can work something out. I know I’m being vague, but I don’t want to dash hopes if I can’t make it work. Lets just say I may have more to say.

In the end I spent today writing some interesting scenes, this time with dialogue for the first time in this book. It’s not complicated or anything, it just feels right. I can’t wait to have someone read through it. But it might be awhile before I have the first draft ready for some editing.

 

What I’ve published

Outsider Trilogy

Outsiders-Book-Cover-RGB-web-safeClick here for a link to the book

Poetry

poems_front2

Link to my author page on Amazon – hhttp://www.amazon.com/Steven-Oaks/e/B00MEGSEZ6

Link to the Deathship book in the CreateSpace store – https://www.createspace.com/5023771

Or you can help me out on Patreon. Again, thank you. https://www.patreon.com/StevenOaks

Update: 1,000 words of a new book written. Several pages edited for the yet unnamed novel.

“Of course motivation is not permanent. But then, neither is bathing; but it is something you should do on a regular basis.”
― Zig Ziglar

Steven Oaks

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