So yesterday I went out with the ex-missus and was able to spend time away from home. Since I had stopped going to a regular job I had little time, money, and opportunities to leave the house. So of course I wound up having a great time. The food was good, and being able to visit a bookstore after so long inspired me, but also depressed me. Here are hundreds of authors writing their stories. All of them established, and me with a single book that I wish to put out there. I feel as though whatever I write will be lost in the sea of competition. The black mood I feel has yet to be lifted, but I push on. Instead of working on the second book, I decided since I’ve yet to get my second editor to look at what I have made I would go back and look through the first book again. Mistakes were found, more than I thought I would locate. I realized now my first run through I had just been glancing at the first pages, and not delving into the story being related. I hope as I continue to reread that I find that I made fewer mistakes, and less story line errors. As I got nearer the end of the ten page goal of the day I did notice improvement, but I am still disheartened. And yet I know there is a good story there. Perhaps it was not as ready as I supposed, but I feel confident that it will be soon.
Update – 10 pages reviewed, feeling down.
“And by the way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.” ― Sylvia Plath
– Steven Oaks